Weigh In and Weighed Down

Well, as expected, I gained a little.  1.4 to be exact and I am ok with that.  In all honesty (cause if I am lying to you, I am lying to me!!) it could have and probably should have been much worse.  And I was wearing more clothing than usual.  Its cooler at 7 am and I have a problem trotting around in shorts when the temps chill off.  So I put on something a little more substantial.  This is an outfit that I like so much that I have 2 of them in different colors and I actually weighed the clothes.  1 lb 8 oz.  Not inconsequential when we are being weighed in tenths of pounds at our meetings.  So I will take it and move on.  Next week will be better.

Today we talked about Motivation and how to maintain it.  What got us on the weight loss train and what keeps us from jumping off at every convenient stop to grab a snack?! 

My motivation may seem selfish, but it comes down to taking care of ME!  I have spent so many years of my life taking care of everyone else and even more so in the last couple years with being primary care giver for my mother.  I came out of last year with a totally different perspective on who was important in my life and I was on the top of that list for a change.  And its what motivates me every day.  

I don't want to sign off without giving a bit of respect to the gravity of the day.  Like most of us, 9/11 is forever linked in my psyche and our communal psyche as well, undoubtly.  I remember where I was (home from work, sick) and watched the second plane hit the second tower.  I sat mesmerized as the morning unfolded, the towers fell and we all cried.  And I was angry and hurt.  I loaded my guns (really!) because I could only imagine that we were under attack and it wasn't going to end there.  I am not a violent person, but I truly believe I could have hurt someone that day! My kids took their kids out of school and came home to be with Mom, not because they felt bad for me, but because Mom was supposed to take care of them.  Hell, I was falling apart!!  I weep as I type this, the emotion is still so raw.  I will never forget.  I can only pray that those that perpertrated this horrible act truly get their just rewards and those that remain behind to grieve the loss of their loved ones will be comforted someday.